making friends can be challenging impossible only something others do
Socialisation
A hard journey for them...and hard for us to watch!
This can be one of the hardest journeys for any child growing up, and even as adults the impact that of negative ‘friendships’ and experiences we faced can form what type of adults we become.
It’s safe to say that making friendships for many of us is hard. Throw into the mix any form of neurodiversity and the challenge probably doubles!
But even for children without any form of neurodiversity, finding ‘their people’ can take a long time, and watching this journey as a parent can be so hard.
I've still not got it right
I’ve spent a long time scouring the internet for the perfect social group for my daughter…and there isn’t one. Because I realise that she is unique, a one-off, a square peg in a raft of round holes. And that’s something to be celebrated but also to struggle with as I continue to hunt for ‘her people’.
But there are some things I’ve done to help her as much as I can, and I’ll keep trying but if there is one thing I’ve learned over this last few very difficult years is that sometimes there isn’t the perfect answer or solution. Continually searching for the ‘ideal education setting’ or ‘medication protocol’ or even the perfect ‘social group’ may just keep delivering the same answers because they simply don’t exist. So we have to learn sometimes that this is enough and we’re trying our best.
Find my local council and view support groups there
Social Media Groups
I predominantly use Facebook to find local kids groups (eg. home ed, specific interest related, sports etc). I ask to join and more often than not the communities are really welcoming. My advice would be to attend as many as you can and find what fits for your child.
There are also some great organisations online that can signpost you to local groups. I have listed a few below but found this one useful:
Where else can I found local groups?
I’ve found a super website – Club Hub – which allows you to search in your local area for groups and clubs for children of all ages (up to 18). It also lists events near your location.
There is also ClassForKids which allows you to search by location for classess clos to you.
My child is getting buillied - what can I do?
It’s heart-breaking to think that a child is being bullied, let alone your child. If you believe there is something going, the first thing is to listen to your child and try to establish what is happening. Reassure them you won’t take any action unless they want you to as otherwise you could lose their trust. And ask them what they want to do next and what the choices are.
All schools have behaviour policies in place which should be available on their website. You can also find out lots of information on the Anti-Bullying Alliance website here >
Did you know?
YouGov survey of 4k parents found that only 25% of children under 18 play face-to-face with friends or family daily!
Social scripts and stories
A social script is a document that uses storytelling techniques to explain new experiences and environments to autistic people through simple language and images. Through social stories and roleplay, we can help our children begin to understand social activities and how to respond and enjoy social situations better.
Help them memorise a few go-to conversation starters that you can fall back on in a pinch
Practice role-play and scenarios
Practicing how to be a friend with siblings, parents and trusted friends may strengthen conversational skills and prepare children for opportunities to make friends when they happen.
Organisations that offer information and support include:
Club Hub has millions of parents and carers searching for kids’ activities regularly for free. Check out our most popular categories on our directory and support children’s activity providers across the UK.
Visit website >
Talk topics and forums to open up new conversations and access to local parents in similar situations
Visit website >
Discover thousands of kids classes across the UK
Visit website >
We’re here for children and young people with special educational needs and disabilities, young carers and families. We’re on a mission to create a world where all kinds of kids have all kinds of opportunities.
Visit website >
Our social groups are a relaxing space for autistic people to meet and socialise and participate in a variety of activities. Current groups include activities for children, young people and adults.
Visit website >
Worried about how your little one will cope at big school? The start of term can be an emotional time for everyone, especially if your child is heading off to a new school.
Visit website >
resources that may help include:
